I've been away too long.

My conversations have been few.

But while I've been away

Each and every day

My heart is beating next to you.

But now I'm here at last

And I mean to stay...

Sharon Jones and the Dap Kings -- "Tell Me"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EB69Ij5X6AE

(Go check out the coolest group ever)

So I'm stuck at home with sick Short People...what to do? I've decided to take advantage and drag my inconsistent self back to the blogging world. I haven't been here since March? Really? Geez, what is wrong with me? I've been trying to figure out why, and...uh...I've got nothing. So I'm just going to try to do better. Hopefully I will succeed.

The Short People are thriving in our neighborhood, where 8 girls under the age of 9 overshadow our lone neighbor boy (poor, poor Benjamin!) with their Kool Kats Klub as they gather en masse in sunglasses, beads and the occasional tutu to ride bikes, scooters or skateboards and nag each other like the true girls they are. And my god are they driving all the parents crazy! I am seriously considering buying all of us referee shirts and whistles for afternoons and weekends, when we are all forced out of our homes for hours at a time to intervene in the "I had the trapeze first", "she won't share her hula hoop", "but they're MY skates" arguments. Yesterday actually ended in some fisticuffs. But my, do they all look lovely while they are acting like wild animals. They appear much more civilized here at India's 7th birthday party.

When not verging on juvenile delinquency the Short People are busy with school. Kate started kindergarten this year, and India is in second grade. The solo photo of Kate was taken on her very first field trip to the Graves Mountain Apple Orchard to pick apples. I chaperoned this trip, and had a great time. We made a fabulous apple crisp with our selections.

Both Short People are taking dance. India is continuing to enjoy ballet and Kate has found she is a tap/jazz kind of gal. The picture of India is from her spring ballet recital. Pardon the stage makeup, she doesn't go out of the house like that on a regular basis, I swear. Kate likes a little more funk and is a big fan of Sharon Jones, Stevie Wonder, and Deelite. Kate can sometimes be heard warbling another one of Sharon Jones' songs "I ain't nobody's baby, I ain't nobody's fool...better get yourself a new one". God forbid some boy ever try to mess with Katie in the future. She'll use some of those techniques she's learned in the neighborhood...

As long as the Short People don't pass their crud to me I will be spending this weekend at parts unknown for an early surprise birthday present. T. is sending me off somewhere with my mom and sister for what he is calling "Amy's Fun Weekend". Hopefully I will make it.

Time to sign off and break out the Lysol...

When your sweet lilting laughter's

Like some fairy song,

And your eyes twinkle bright as can be;

You should laugh all the while

And all other times smile,

And now, smile a smile for me.

Chauncey Olcott and George Graff, Jr. -- "When Irish Eyes are Smiling"

Confession time: when I began LDWSP I made a deal to challenge myself by beginning each post with only the lyrics of songs I know. I had to make a slight exception for this one, because though I am well aware of the chorus (who has been to a bar on St. Patty's and isn't?) I was clueless about the rest of the lyrics. Not only did I have to look them up but I had to research the writers as well. I won't make a habit of it, but the only other Irish songs I know are all depressing. Besides, Kate has a lovely smile, doesn't she?

Now let me just say up front that I am not Irish. In fact, my family is decidedly Scottish. I come from the McKay clan on both maternal and paternal sides. Weird, I know. We aren't from West Virginia, I promise. This was generations ago (I hope...).

So is it sacrilege for me to celebrate St. Patrick's Day? Probably. But when your sister marries an Irish descendant, your nephew is named Rowen (with reddish hair, not less), and your daughter is born a few days before St. Pat's it's an easy theme. And a fun one.

I think Kate had a great time during her weekend-long birthday revelry. To help her feel better about being apart from her friends on her birthday I followed my friend Janice's perennial party advice and "threw money at the problem". I bought a variety of sparkly tattoos, fancy headgear, decorations, lots of Irish goodies, made an Irish cake and an Irish-themed game, and made reservations at our favorite Irish pub. The only glitch in the whole Irish extravaganza was a lack of green bagels; apparently they weren't making them until Sunday. Oh well. There was more than enough green to make up for it; if you look closely you can see that I am even sporting some green sparkly nail polish to match my tattoo.






To add to the excitement the Short People had a real, live baby doll to entertain. Even Kate, who was not too excited about a baby, and a boy baby at that, was entranced by Rowen. He is a cutie, isn't he? Their fascination led to a fervent desire to care for their own baby dolls, so our den was littered with babies, clothes, diapers, bottles and accessories for real and fake babies alike. Made me have a few brief (very brief) pangs to have another. Don't worry, Tracy, it won't last.

We celebrated Kate's birthday in Irish style, but we also honored a few other occasions. My parents had their 40th wedding anniversary in January, my father turned 60 in February, and Derek had a birthday earlier in the month so we were a partying group. Mom and Dad are going to the Angus Barn for a private meal for two cooked in front of them with one of their renowned chefs, and Derek got a pub tee and some good beer...what can I say, I told you he was Irish! Since my parents are enjoying a second childhood as music groupies we treated my father to tickets to see Delbert McClinton at the Birchmere. He is famous for guessing his gifts so Clare and I decided to fool him. His certificate was taped to a rock (to weight the present) and labeled "and roll". Rock and Roll...get it?

I don't know, do you think he is excited about his gift?

Thanks for a great weekend, everyone. We miss you already!

What's new pussycat?

(Whoooaaaooh)

What's new pussycat?

(Whoooaaaooh)

Pussycat, pussycat I love you.

Yes, I do.
Tom Jones -- "What's New Pussycat?"

What's new is that you are FIVE today.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO OUR

KITTY CAT KATE!

Kate was born loving cats. As a result of this affinity she changed her name at age 3. She informed us..."I not Tate (she couldn't pronounce her "k"s so she was "Tate", not Kate). I Titty Tat Tate!". From that day on her name has been Kitty Cat Kate. Too bad Tracy is allergic to cats or she would be getting a kitten for her birthday. Poor girl has to resign herself to the stuffed animal kind, of which she has a bevy.

When we moved, our friend Sally made a mix cd of classic 60s hits for us to listen to on our trip. By far Kate's favorite song is this annoying little Tom Jones number. She listens to it over and over and warbles along, especially on the "whoooaaah"s. Gee, thanks Sally! Haven't figured out how to pay you back yet, but I will think of something.

It is difficult to turn 5 when you don't have many friends in town to celebrate with. She has selected blueberry pancakes, saucheege (sausage) and scrambled eggs for her birthday dinner. She already received the aforementioned Dan Zanes tickets (see previous post), but will have a couple of other surprises to open as well.

Kate had another birthday celebration when Tracy's parents visited two weeks ago. They brought with them a new big girl bike! A wonderful gift, especially now that we have a normal, paved drive instead of crushed clamshells. She is enjoying zooming around with all the neighbor girls.

On Saturday all of my family is coming to party down for a big St. Patrick's Day themed birthday party. We're serving all green foods including a green cake, green ice cream, sandwiches on green bagels and green punch. We'll play a rousing game of "pin the gold on the pot at the end of the rainbow" and later we will head to an Irish pub for dinner. We also plan to celebrate my brother-in-law Derek's birthday, and since he is Irish it's a great pick.

Maybe Kate would agree to go with the St. Patrick's Day theme every year. Who can beat green beer?

House Party Time

jump up

day is breaking

jump up

let's get shaking

i know you're lying down
jump up and we'll dance around...

jump up

clouds are passing

look up

the sky is laughing

i know we'll be laughing too

jump up i want to dance with you

Dan Zanes -- "Jump Up"

We here at Long Day With Short People are music snobs. When the Short People were born we vowed never to listen to the dreaded children's music, a genre we hate for it's sacchirine singing, cutesy sentiments and just plain bad musicianship. Anyone who has ever felt their eardrums bleed from listening to 25 rounds of Barney's "I love you...you love me..." or happened upon The Wiggles will understand.

When we had our first Short Person I didn't know any children's lullabies so our girls have grown up being soothed to The Beatles "In My Life" or this lovely Tom Petty song (can't remember the name...the Short People call it "Daddy's Song) as we tuck them in bed. I will never forget India's first Mommy and Me swim class where I was the only Mommy who did not know the words to "The Wheels on the Bus". Unfortunately, I know them now. My mother, sister and I prefer to make up our own irreverent lyrics to that one... but that's another blog.

A few years ago I was pleasantly surprised to discovered Dan Zanes and Friends. A former member of the 80s band the Del Fuegos, Dan Zanes plays "family music" which is code for "music that doesn't suck". His stuff is so good that once my parents heard a couple songs and asked us to burn a copy for them, not knowing it was a CD for children. The New York Times wrote that “Zanes' kids music works because it is not kids music; it’s just music - music that’s unsanitized, unpasteurized, that’s organic even.”

So when I learned that Dan Zanes was going to appear in concert the weekend before Kate's birthday we decided that would be a fun early birthday present. We weren't disappointed. I actually think it was one of the best concerts I have heard...okay, behind Pink Floyd, Neil Young and Dave Matthews Band, the Indigo Girls with Matthew Sweet, Jethro Tull, The Allman Bros, Old Crow Medicine Show...but I truly did enjoy myself.

What made the concert so cool (besides real musical talent that included a mandolin, upright bass, banjo, saxophone and trumpet) was the laid back, inclusive vibe. Everyone was encouraged to dance in front of the stage or in the aisles (Zanes told the audience "we can either have a concert, and that's cool, or we can have a DANCE PARTY!!!!"). You can imagine who made a bee-line and landed smack-dab in front of the stage. I hope I didn't dislocate any Short Person's arm pulling them down front...

During "Catch That Train" the band convinced almost the entire audience to form a train and dance through the concert hall, out into the lobby and back in again in a giant, happy circle. They had everyone singing along, and the songs were all very cool. "Wabash Cannonball", "Walkin' The Dog", a couple of gospel tunes and even some Spanish songs. For the last number the band unplugged all their instruments and continued to play and sing as they strolled the aisles and led the entire audience into the lobby where they serenaded a girl in a wheelchair, then led us all down the hall and into a courtyard where they posed for pictures and signed autographs.

I DID NOT HAVE MY CAMERA.

I WAS TICKED OFF.

But Kate did have a homemade musical instrument made from paper plates and popcorn that she shook so hard during the concert I was afraid we would pelt our neighbors with hard corn kernels. Dan Zanes signed it for Kate and wished her a happy birthday; what a great present! I'm going to have it framed along with her ticket.

But it would be even cooler to frame the autograph along with a picture of Dan Zanes and the Short People.

Maybe next time..

This is the end

Beautiful friend

The Doors -- "The End"

The last few months have been sad ones. We had to say goodbye to the place we loved and find a new home. The Eastern Shore was a wonderful fit for us with gorgeous unspoiled water, open spaces and fabulous friends. It was the place where we found our beautiful home, and it was the place where are children were born. We lived there for over 10 years and planned on staying there forever.

But some things don't last forever, and we decided that Tracy's job needed to be one of them. The decision to move was made even more difficult by the fact that we had to keep it a secret, even from our closest friends, for almost a year. The Shore is a small, close-knit place and word travels FAST, so this huge elephant was in the room with us and we couldn't talk about it. Even in front of the Short People. Talk about a challenge! Try having a crisis and keeping it a secret even in your own home. Throw in all my health problems and the death of my beloved grandmother in October and you get one gal who just did not have much happy to discuss for the last few months. If you can't visualise my mood just ask Tracy; he'll do a fine imitation of Amy In A Snit.

So now we are in Culpeper Virginia, trading the sea for the mountains. We've been here for almost two months. Boxes are mostly unpacked, the snow is melting, and the shiny is rubbing off. In typical kid fashion the Short People are resilient and have adapted marvellously to all the changes. India loves her new school and Kate has enjoyed a brief reprieve from preschool to stay home every day with me until she starts kindergarten in the fall. India adores having her own room (can't say the same for Kate, especially when India says "I need some private time" and shuts that door) and they love being in a neighborhood. Some of the sweetest words a stressed-out mom can hear are "Can India and Kate come out to play?".

There are still some growing pains. Tracy is trying to find his way in a completely different hospital environment and is commuting 40 minutes one way. A blackberry and laptop were waiting on his desk day one, and I have never seen Tracy react with such disgust. I miss all my friends terribly. Wednesdays are days of mourning knowing that playgroup goes on without me. Honestly, though, I am enjoying a break from all of my volunteer work, and am taking the time to sit back and focus on family and health. We are renting until we can sell our house (in this market that may be a year from now), so there is no pressure to decorate, hang pictures or paint. After taking care of a large home built in 1835 with a lot of land, a new construction house with a garage, trash and recycling pickup and CLOSET SPACE is a treat. And we still have a decent yard for the Short People and the dogs, too.

The past four months haven't been all stress and mayhem; during my hiatus from blogging some wonderful things happened. My nephew, James Rowen Tyner, was born on December 14th. He is the cutest, best baby in the whole world and you'll be seeing a lot of him. We had several fabulous sendoffs, pictured here, so we could say goodbye in style. The Tooth Fairy has been a frequent flyer over our house, causing a few panicked trips to the bank for more golden dollars. India was asked to audition for the Richmond/Tidewater Ballet Nutcracker; she didn't make the cut because she was too small for the costume (she is tiny but mighty) but it was an honor to be asked. I turned 39, where I plan to remain until I die.

It's time to crawl back on the Long Day With Short People wagon. I hope you all haven't forgotten me. And I hope some of my Shore friends will join the ride. I miss you guys!

Oh, and do you know anyone who wants to buy a fabulous farm house on the Eastern Shore?

Oh, my crazy baby

Try to hold on tight

Joan Osborne -- "Crazy Baby"

Our almost 200 year old home survived the storm on Saturday just fine, with just a few limbs down and several bushels of walnuts to pick up before we can mow. The house is as right as rain, as it has been for almost 200 years. A house built to withstand the ravages of time and weather.

I can't say as much for our mental health.

On a good day the Short People are what most people politely call "busy" or "energetic"; code words for "high energy" or even "pain in the ass". They do not, I repeat, do NOT like to be at home or have to entertain themselves for long periods. My girls like to be On The Move at all times. They wake up each morning, rub the sleep from their eyes and inquire "What are we going to do today?" and woe to the parent who answers "nothing".

As an aside, this makes living on the Eastern Shore very difficult during every season but summer, and all of those activities are OUTSIDE.

So being confined to the house without the ability to play outside, combined with the very real threat that the power might go out, was more than the Short People could bear. I had, as part of our Hurricane Preparation Kit, socked away some crafts and activities but we ripped through those faster than Hannah. We even painted a birdhouse, which they completely covered in paint in 2.8 seconds and then asked for the next activity. We also had a dance party, courtesy of A & N Electric, who managed to keep us in power (thank you!) the whole day. Can you say Cupid Shuffle? What can I say, the Short People apparently like a line dance.

We also enjoyed quite a bit of dress up, as you can see. Yes, that is a tiara Tracy is wearing in the first photo. Later India modeled her very creative "Ariel" look, replete with a red scarf for hair and a mermaid's tail hanging out of her p.j.s. I know, the p.j.s are both Valentine's and Christmas; what can I say, at least they match...sort of.

In short, we weathered the storm but ended up with a nice case of cabin fever. Hurricane season isn't over yet...time to go restock the arts and crafts.

And maybe a bottle of wine or two?

I built this ship - it is my making

And furthermore my self control

I can't rely on anymore

I know why - I know why

Crazy on a ship of fools

Crazy on a ship of fools

Turn this boat around - back to my loving ground

Robert Plant -- "Ship of Fools"

Or perhaps I should I have started right off with "Just sit right back and you'll hear a tale, a tale of a fateful trip...".

We decided to celebrate Labor Day with a group of our friends on Cedar Island, another of the Barrier Islands that line Virginia's Eastern Shore. Six families (13 children ranging from 12 to 2) were to meet at around 10:00 Monday to spend the day and cook lunch on the beach. We planned to push off around 3:00 so we could all return home for a leisurely evening of prepping for the first day of school on Tuesday.

Out of the six families, three of us have boats. This poses no problem; we can easily fit an extra 3-4 people in each boat. But...one of our boat-owning families experienced a boat casualty the day before so we were down to two. Okay, no worries, we regrouped and just ran an extra shuttle trip back and forth. Within an hour we had all 25 people safely relaxing on the beach. The children were playing and swimming, the adults were exploring ( one found THIS above... we are assuming it's a whale bone) and enjoying Mary's Famous Margaritas. It was FUN.

The most enjoyable part of the trip was what the kids dubbed the "Hubba Hubba Highway". The HHH consisted of entering the water in front of our boat (braver children jumped off the side of the boat), then letting the current,which runs parallel to the Island in this spot, carry them past three boats to a designated exit spot. Even some of us adults rode the HHH. It reminded me very much of childhood tubing trips in the mountains...floating down a lazily moving current.

So relaxing.

Finally it was time for some of us to head back. Our friend John (see "Worries to the Sea" part I) ferried one family and just DID NOT RETURN. None of the guys were worried (their theory was that John was on a beer run) but after excessive nagging the wives finally convinced Tracy to go in search of John. And boy did he find him.

John was sitting on the dock, literally covered from head to foot in black marsh mud. He found John's boat a good 300 yards away, stuck in the marsh. Apparently John's steering had gone out, causing the boat to go kamakaze and catapult John into the water. This is a very, very dangerous thing. The Shore is full of stories about people who have been thrown from their boat and either hit their heads and been knocked unconscious or been sucked into the propeller and cut to ribbons. John managed to surface and push the boat away from him and into the marsh, where the engine revved at full throttle, threatening to blow. John made his way through knee deep muck, cutting his feet on oyster shells, to cut off the engine before it exploded, and then walk through this mud back to the dock. So we are down to 5 families, 11 children, and one boat.

Tracy got John into his boat and then realized that OUR boat was not running properly. Now we are down to NO BOAT, lots of tired and cranky people (and that's just the parents) who want to go home and get ready for the first day of school tomorrow, and no way to get there. Thank goodness for cell phones; Tracy called us to tell us what was happening and we found rides with other boaters. Another lovely thing about the Eastern Shore...folks are amazingly friendly and accomodating.

Once we had recovered from our boating (mis)adventures, it was off to school for the Short People. India's first day of first grade was on Tuesday, and she ran to the car at pickup time yelling "First grade is AWESOME!!!". Let's hope they work on her vocabulary a bit, but we're thrilled that she is so happy. Kate's first day of pre-K was Thursday, and she was a little "nuwvus" but seemed to enjoy herself.






Each Short Person selected their own "first day" outfits but were not allowed to accessorize. We are experiencing an accessory ban here, mostly because they broke 5 bracelets in 4 days last week. Evidently some of this happened because they were playing "pets" and using stretchy beaded bracelets as "collars". They would tie a scarf "leash" to the "collar" and pull each other along, calling each other names like "Clarabelle" and "Fluffy". Yes, school couldn't come back around soon enough around here...we clearly ran out of fun things to do and were really reaching down into the depths of our imaginations. This leash and collar design looked waaaayy too S & M and also resulted in a multitude of brightly colored and very tiny beads scattered everywhere; the vaccum and I are still finding them. The accessory ban is for the best; if I let them they would arrive at school looking like Evana Trump.





Now we are battening down the hatches for the big storm. School was on a two hour delay this morning thanks to the weather; sometimes fog rolls in from across the bay before a big storm and this is what our yard looked like at 7:00. Time to go fill up the tub, pull out the batteries and charge the cell phones. Wish us luck!

WORRIES TO THE SEA PART II

Hello old friend,

Its really good to see you once again.

Eric Clapton -- "Hello Old Friend"

Do people you've only known for 5 years count as old friends?

Perhaps it's just that the Arthurs feel like old friends, comfortable and easy. Always fun. As the old saying goes, they are who we would call if we needed bailing out of prison. Not that I think that's going to happen Mom and Dad(who don't want to think about such things) and Arthurs (who don't want to make that drive to Virginia), but if it were to happen, we know they would answer that call. Collect, even.

Now that they live half a country away we don't see the Arthurs as often as we would like, but Janice and I talk almost weekly and Pat still tries to make it to North Carolina for the annual Merlefest dude convention along with John from the previous post "Worries to the Sea I". Still, we miss them terribly, so when we had the chance to spend a week with them on Ocracoke, one of our favorite places, we were extatic.

Our house was AMAZING, as you can see from the beautiful photo of the back of the house taken from our boat and our fantastic view. We were able to dock our boat in the canal in the backyard; every day was spent on the beach and the fellas fished from the back patio every night. They caught around 10 species that included, besides the usual suspects, some sharks, some rays, some very nasty looking eels that even the crabs wouldn't touch, and a turtle.

The Short People and the Arthur boys are much more self-sufficient than when we did this two years ago, so we could relax without feeling that a child was on the verge of drowning at any moment. What a relief! We also needn't worry about a dealing with a fall down the stairs, a two year old with a dizzy spell, or someone coating their face and hair with vaseline when we weren't looking (yep, they all really happened on our first go 'round...I'm sure there were more calamities but time and the Margaritas have blocked them out).

Some things don't change. Of course, just like two years ago, Kate had us up at the Crack (Crap) Of Dawn every morning. That child has some kind of internal clock that I would like to reset but just can't. Maybe in 2010 she'll sleep until 7:30?

The highlight of our trip was taking the boat to a large sandbar near "Teach's Hole", the pirate Blackbeard's hangout where he guzzled rum and did whatever else pirates do - including burying treasure, or so the legend goes. Wouldn't you know it, but the kids found these mysterious "Xs" in the sand and when they dug, voila! Doubloons! And one for each child. What a coincidence. Someone alert the papers! Psssst...Pat was the one with the brilliant idea. I'd steal it if I were you.

The water on this bar was as clear as if we had landed in the tropics, and we saw skates, anemones, tons of huge hermit crabs, and great shells. The waves were so gentle; perfect for young children, and the sandbar was nearly empty. Heaven! Here is where I could have spent every day. I might still be there if they hadn't dragged me away. I cannot describe the unmarred beauty and clarity of this spot. The sandbars change every year, particularly after hurricanes, so who knows if I will ever see this sandbar again, but it lives on in my memory as the best day of our trip.

We also enjoyed the bounty of the ocean and I'm sorry that I don't have a photo to show off our fabulous feast. Or perhaps it's good you can't see what gluttons we were! We ate smoked bluefish, beer batter fried fresh catch (Pat's specialty), steamed blue crabs and clams, corn on the cob...you get the idea. It was better than I could possibly describe and all caught by us except for the clams (Pat found 2 so we had to cheat and buy some...we'll get lessons in clamming before our next trip).

The kids picked up playing as if they had just seen each other last week. It was amazing to see them together again; Joe and Gus were really the Short People's first friends. In fact the Short People liked each other SO much that Janice overheard Kate approach Joe and inquire "Joe, India wants to know if you like her". In typical guy fashion he had no clue what she was asking so he looked at her as if she were insane and replied "Uh, Yeah?". Kate then clarified (and here is where my concerns begin) "No, I mean, do you like , LIKE HER like her?"

WHAT?

I don't know what to be most disturbed about in that exchange...a) there were way too many uses of the word "like", b) that India and Kate understand a little more about boy/girl relationships than I think is proper for a 4 and 6 year old, or c) that India is using Kate as an emissary to do her dirty work. Sounds a little mafioso to me; next thing you know she'll have Kate bumping off her playground rivals. At least Joe had the good sense to be clueless like an almost 7 year old should be.

Boy/girl issues aside, clearly this was a fabulous vacation. And even if I couldn't find all the energy that I wanted, even if I was the first grown-up in bed every night, even if I didn't feel perfect every moment, the moments were wonderful. Thanks, Arthurs. We miss you!

Blue is the color of night

When the red sun

Disappears from the sky

Raven feathers shiny and black

A touch of blue glistening down her back

Lucinda Williams -- "Blue"

The code word is BLUE in the Key and Tyner families. I am going to have a NEPHEW! Since our poor father was henpecked by 5 aunts and a sister then went on to have 2 daughters and 2 granddaughters ( god, even most of our pets were female), I think he is going to be terribly relieved to have some testosterone in the mix.

We won't speak about the Short People's reaction to this news; let's just say that they are wearing tiny black arm bands and draping the mirrors. "Boys are yucky", they say. We're encouraging this sentiment in the (lost) hope that they will continue to feel that way until they are at least in college.

Please stop over at the Sunday Night Buttermilk Waltz and say congrats. Please also suggest a middle name for this poor baby; so far all they have is James ____________ Tyner. I am voting for Irwin or Rowen (or maybe Elvis...Clare is due near his birthday), Kate is hoping for Max, India likes William and Tracy is rooting for Alexander. But come on, people, let's get creative! Be funky! Alopecia, Chris Robinson, Shaft...everything is on the table at this point. If we don't help Derek and Clare the child may officially be crowned James Blank Tyner.

SO happy for you both ( even the Short People), and can't wait to meet little what's his name!

She was a big boned gal

From Southern Alberta

You just couldn't call her small

K. D. Lang -- "Big Boned Gal"

It is official...I have a diagnosis. I have acromegaly.


What the heck is that, you say? That's what we said, too, when the doctor first started used the term.


Remember Andre the Giant? Robert Wadlow from Ripley's World's Tallest Man? They had acromegaly. This difference is that they developed the disease when they were children, which caused their haywire hormones to tell their bodies to grow without ceasing.


In adults, folks with acromegaly don't get taller, they just get BIGGER. Fat and puffy, bigger hands and feet (here's why you haven't seen in photos of me in quite a while). The copious amounts of steriods I have taken in the last 2 years haven't helped, either, nor has my inability to exercise. Acromegaly also causes enlargement of some facial features, ribcage, other places. And not only is your exterior growing but your organs can continue to enlarge as well, putting great strain on you heart and other organs. There are a myriad other unpleasant symptoms too. In me, it seems to be causing all of the sinus swelling, fatigue and immune system problems that have mystified my ENT and every other doctor I have seen for the last 15 years.


Acromegaly is rare, effecting about 1 in 25,000. It can sometimes be fatal if gone unchecked, and there are some scary things I am more at risk for now. I may have to have pituitary surgery, or may just have to take a very expensive injection every month for the rest of my life. We don't know yet.

Sound pretty terrible, I know, but despite all the frightening aspects of acromegaly I have to admit Tracy and I are so relieved. We were starting to lose hope; we've seen so many specialists and had so many false hopes dashed. To just have a name is a gift in itself, and the thought of a treatment that may alleviate some of my symptoms just sounds too good to be true. Does anyone remember the episode of the Cosby Show when Theo was diagnosed with dyslexia? His whole family celebrated because at last they had an explanation for his poor school performance and it was something he could receive help for. This is precisely how we feel, as odd as that may be. We have hope; something we have been in short supply of lately. And we have a plan, which both of us need.

When I was young my parents had a great book called "Grave Humor". It was filled with true, and hilarious, epitaphs. One of my favorites was "I TOLD you I was sick". We often joked it was the perfect motto for the headstone of a neighborhood hypochondriac. Now, eating my words, I feel like calling several physicians and others who have been both unsupportive and disbelieving and screaming that epitaph into their non-listening ears. Particularly those of us who are women have almost universally experienced being put down and ignored in the doctor's office, and I have sure had more than my share of that. It's nice to have confirmation for what my family and I knew all along...there really IS something wrong.

Another thought that plagues me is how lucky I am to have the resources and education to advocate for myself. The doctor who diagnosed me called me "politely pesky" and stated frankly that was the motivator which kept him on track in helping me. I reminded him that if I weren't "politely pesky" I would have given up years ago when one doctor in particular told me that whatever was wrong with me was in my head. I have had to be my own best advocate, with my very supportive husband by my side. I often wonder about all those people struggling daily with major health concerns because they do not have the ability to constantly push, call, write, and cajole until they receive help. Don't get me on my soapbox about the state of health care in our country...that's a whole other post.

As I type I am waiting to hear about an appointment at UVa with a pituitary specialist; please keep your fingers crossed that we won't have to wait months to get in. The waiting is what kills me...those of you who know me well that patience is not one of my virtues!

If you are interested in hearing more about this crazy disorder this is a great website: http://www.emedicinehealth.com/acromegaly/article_em.htm#Acromegaly Overview.

WORRIES TO THE SEA I

Sunset at the shoreline, we are laughing, breaking up,
Just like the waves
Are you feeling, feeling, feeling like I'm feeling
Like I'm floating, floating, up above that big blue ocean.
Sand beneath our feet, big blue sky above our heads,
No need to keep stressing from our everyday life on our minds
We have got to leave all that behind

I have worries to give to the sea...

The Avett Brothers -- " At the Beach"

Great minds think alike.

As Tracy and I spent Sunday evening on Metompkin Island with our friends John and Susan, watching the sun set, I was envisioning what a great post this would make. One of the most healing things for me is the ocean, and the above song perfectly expresses the happy lure of the sea. It has been a running theme song for our family this summer, even for the Short People who often request what they call "The Whistle Song" for it's infectious, you guessed it, whistling. Ironically, as we were leaving, John referenced "At the Beach" by quietly suggesting "okay, give your worries to the sea..." as we pushed off for home.

Metompkin Island is one of the series of Barrier Islands that line the seaside of the Eastern Shore. They are accessible only by boat, and are (besides our wonderful friends) hands down our favorite thing about living on the Eastern Shore of Virginia. Once you park yourself on one of these Islands you can easily be the only people there. While we could see several families at Cedar Island, the next island down, we were blissfully alone. During winter when cold, wet, fog-laden winds blow across the Shore from the Chesapeake Bay and there is nothing to do, we just close our eyes and wait for summer and THIS.

I sure did a lot of that waiting over the past winter. Once spring came and I could get back to the water I felt much better. I have been lucky enough to have 3 distinct experiences involving the sea that have all contributed to my rebound into the land of the living (and blogging) from that ugly place I spent most of the foul weather months. The other two will be covered in upcoming posts, but I just couldn't resist starting with this one since John apparently read my mind.

John and Susan are wonderful friends. Susan and I like many of the same things, were raised with some similar quirks particular to the South that we laugh about, and she is one of those people that is just easy to be with. She also struggles with some mysterious health maladies so we can often "get" each other when no one else does. John is one of Tracy's Merlefest buddies, has the most infectious laugh and is just one of the all-round nicest guys I know. Their daughters Ellie and Anne (my Goddaughter) are stairsteps to the Short People...Ellie 7, India 6, Anne 5 and Kate 4. They are perhaps my girls' closest friends, and you can see them hosting a dance party in our living room here. They are a fearsome foursome, for certain, and Susan and I joke that we are sometimes glad they don't attend the same school or woe to all their teachers! And us parents, too, when they all reach the teenage years at the same time.

But on this night we were able to have a rare moment sans Short People and just enjoy each other's adult company. We picked up a bucket of Tammy's and Johnny's chicken (Oh, you have never tasted fried chicken like this...there are always lines of people waiting for an order), grabbed some adult beverages and just sat. The fellas did a little fishing and returned with a couple of entertaining fish tales for us ("John caught a croaker that was THIS big!" and "Tracy hooked into a shark or something and it just took his line...he really needed some off shore tackle to land it") and Susan and I shelled and, believe it or not, did crossword puzzles (yeah, we're geeks) until it was too dark to see.

Then we remembered that the dock is unlit, so we took a quick boat ride to watch the amazing sunset and beat it back. I tried to take some photos of John and Susan's house from the water but it was just too dark by that point...wish I could show you. It is incredible and their view is perhaps the best on the Shore. You can see the gorgeous sunset here; this is John and Susan's view every night. We made it to the dock just in time; any later and we wouldn't have been able to see a thing. The greenhead flies could see just fine, though, and found me quite delicious as I held the boat line waiting for Tracy to back up the trailer. Susan ran with the DEET to save me from being carried off by the meanest bugs you've ever experienced...now that's what friends are for.

We all agreed that we should do this again (with kids this time... maybe...if we have to) before it gets too cold and dark too early. What a fantastic way to end a day. Thank you, ocean, and John and Susan, for your friendship. And for taking my worries.