You give me fever, when you kiss me

Fever when you hold me tight

Fever in the morning

Fever all through the night

-- Peggy Lee

Yes, I've been sick. Again. It won't be long before I've run out of music quotes that involve illness. If you can think of any, send them just in case. I know you are all tired of hearing about it, because I'm tired of reporting it. I have an appointment with a specialist in Richmond in a few weeks and hopefully we will get down to the bottom of all this sickness soon. Enough about that.

Before I got sick I managed to get a shot of a sign that is the topic of much conversation here on the Shore. Daughty's Market is infamous for posting the names of folk who haven't paid their account. There have been some amusing ones, but this is the first time I've gotten one on film. My favorite was a man named "Marvelous Jubilee". That is a real man, and it is his REAL name. We know this because Tracy had to attend driving school with him (a whole other story).

Since Daughty's is infamous for selling mostly beer and scrapple (if you don't know, don't ask) I would have thought the good Reverend would be so embarrassed that he would rush in to pay his bill, but this little gem has been up for two weeks.

Now that I'm back among the living we might actually leave the house; I'll have some new photos to post soon. Thanks to all who have checked in.

A Little Floyd For the Short People

IF YOU DON'T EAT YOUR MEAT,

HOW CAN YOU HAVE ANY PUDDING?

HOW CAN YOU HAVE ANY PUDDING

IF YOU DON'T EAT YOUR MEAT?

--PINK FLOYD

Actually what India said last night was "Kate, how can you have any pudding if you don't eat your beef?", but what's the difference, really? They both looked askance at me as I quoted the correct lyrics in a loud, terrible British accent. Several times. Guess what album was stuck in my head the rest of the night?

Today was a busy one. Off to playgroup, rush home for lunch and naps, then my goddaughter Anne arrives for a play date while her mother, Susan, had a meeting with Ellie's kindergarten teacher.

I sat outside and worked crossword puzzles while the girls played.A little helper dropped onto my page when I was stuck. Can you believe how tiny he is?



John came by after work and all the Masons stayed for an impromptu dinner when Tracy arrived home (finally!) at 6:00. We kept our girls up too late for a school night, but the grown-ups were having fun and the short people and company were enjoying watching Mary Poppins. We take advantage of any quiet we can get with this foursome!

Watermelon picture 2006

see that watermelon smiling through the fence

i wish that watermelon it was mine

sometimes i think that old folks ain't got a little sense

when they leave that watermelon on the vine

well apples are sweet and peaches are good
rabbits so very very fine

but give me oh give me

oh how i wish you would

some of that watermelon smiling on the vine

-- Dave Matthews Band

Starting India's first summer we began producing an annual photograph of the Short People posing with a sample of our watermelon crop. This tradition began when my Aunt Katie gave India a "onesie" covered in watermelons; the picture was cute and a friend suggested we make it an annual event.

We have done this without fail, even the summer after Kate was born and we forgot to plant any watermelons. I scrambled at the end of the season, searching in vain, and in desperation finally bought two "personal watermelons" (whatever they are) from the market at a price tag of about $50 a piece. Cheater.

This photo collection hangs in our kitchen, and we'll keep going until the Short People rebel and declare themselves too cool to adorn themselves with clothing festooned with pink and green fruits.

Today the girls enjoyed eating the watermelon but had a much more exciting time sharing the rinds with Daisy. Daisy, like most labs, will eat anything, but has a penchant for melon rinds and corn husks...guess she has a clean digestive tract!

Taking the photos was the last task we accomplished before saying goodbye to Tracy. He is off to the Hotel Roanoke (yes, I am pea-green with envy) for a four day convention. Have a wonderful time, TT, enjoy the solitude and argument- and ketchup-free meals, and we'll see you Wednesday night!

Down With Disease

Down with disease

Up before the Dawn

A thousand barefoot children outside dancing on my lawn...

But when I think it's time to leave it all behind

I try to find a way to but there's nothing I can say to make it stop

--Phish

Just two weeks into preschool and already India has brought home a lovely case of upset stomach to share with the other 2 Turman girls (photo above is from her first day). Been stuck in the house for two days and canceled dinner and lunch plans with friends and their children...didn't want to spread the joy, of course. The word on the street is this fabulous virus is making it's rounds on the Shore; we always love being the first to try out something new.

Today we are watching Mary Poppins while dressed in every possible combination of crowns, mardi gras beads, dress up clothing and scarves. Later we will wreck the kitchen by spreading play-doh (yes, Janice, the dreaded play-doh) through the kitchen and pressing in in the cracks of the floor (very colorful). Unfortunately it is too wet to go outside. I'm still trying to jump-start my fuzzy brain to come up with afternoon activities that prevent abject boredom and frustration. We'll see how it goes.

Did you see them in the river?

They were there to wave to you.

Could you tell that the empty quivered,Brown skinned indian on the banks

That were crowded and narrow,

Held a broken arrow?

--Neil Young

Five years ago today I had just left the Jones Institute for Reproductive Technology in Norfolk after having been poked and examined inside and out by 15 residents and giving a quart of blood to measure my hormone levels. I was in the pharmacy waiting for my $1000 worth of medication when I watched the bombings unfold on live television. I hurried to my car to cross the Bay and return to work as military planes and boats scrambled all around me; I was one of the last cars across before they closed the Chesapeake Bay Bridge Tunnel. Two weeks later I discovered that this fateful day had begun the process that would give me my India.

Where were you?

Bear in the Big Blue House

Welcome, welcome welcome to our big blue house,

Welcome, welcome, welcome to our big blue house,

Door is open, come on in!

It's 6am and I am up. Up and watching "Bear and the Big Blue House". Ninety-nine per cent of our childrens' television watching occurs between 6 and 7 in the morning because the short people are evil, subversive, communist beings who enjoy torturing their parents. Once I can pry my eyes open and stagger to the kitchen for coffee I usually hit the computer for something a little more stimulating than Miffy or, god forbid, the Wiggles.

This morning we are being entertained by "Bear in the Big Blue House". This is a perfectly fine show in the tradition of Jim Henson, but it's difficult for me to watch because I always recall the first time I ever saw this program.

It was December 7, 2003, 6:00am. I was laying on a child-sized hospital bed holding India tightly as she finally gave in to exhaustion and slept for the first time in almost 24 hours. She was 6 months and one day old and had to be held all night to keep her from tearing out her nasogastric tubing and IV. The day before, on her six month birthday, she was admitted to the Children's Hospital of the King's Daughters (CHKD) for "failure to thrive".

What got her there is a long complicated tale involving misdiagnosis, dismissal of me as a hysterical first-time mother, and several treatment wrong turns that worsened India's symptoms. Finally, during this week at CHKD after an exploratory surgery, steps were begun to help India become a healthy, normal baby.

So December 7 I'm laying there in this bed, exhausted beyond words and so emotionally over-the-top that this therapist lacks a pat phrase to neatly package the feelings, the tv in our room is showing "Bear" and, helpless to move or change the channel, I watch.

The episode was a Christmas one, in which the characters find a homeless dog alone and cold in the woods and take him in. Bear tries to explain homelessness to his friends and one of them sings a song that, at the time, was so heartbreaking I could not tolerate it. The floodgates opened, and I cried.

"Cried" is probably not the most appropriate wrd choice. "Racked with sobbing", "quietly wailing", or even "hysterical" are better descriptors. That show...that SONG (oh, it was soooo sad in my memory) had allowed me to finally break down.

So now I stiffen a little whenever "Bear" is on. And at Christmastime I fervently hope to never see that episode.

About 3 months after India's week-long hospitalization she was almost completely healthy and now is just like any other four year old girl. It is easier, most of the time, to let go of some of those darker memories and be so, so thankful for this beautiful, healthy creature that we almost didn't have at all and then almost didn't get to keep. And ultimately it is this beautiful gift that I remember whenever I think about the darkest point of our lives. My sweet, smart, funny, four year old India.

But I still don't like to watch "Bear".

This Old House

This old house is gettin' shaky

This old house is gettin' old

This old house has seen the rain

This old house has seen the cold...

Ain't got time to fix the shingles

Ain't got time to fix the floor...

--Brian Setzer Orchestra

HELP! I'm drowning in home improvement projects. We are simultaneously painting the dining room (I'm flying solo on that one), installing an exhaust system for our oven, having our kitchen cabinets slightly restructured, installing new countertops, new roof and copper guttering over one section of the house, ordering some unfinished bookshelves for our den, pricing patio installation, and waiting for a claims adjuster to estimate our damage from Ernesto. The damage includes water spots on several walls, shingles and window screens down, loss of two telephones and a front door that is swollen shut. I think that's it. I may have left out a project or two, it's difficult to keep track at this point.

For someone who likes things organized this is torture. It doesn't help that you have to pass through the dining room to move from the den to the kitchen or bathroom! There is no way to avoid the ladders, sheeting, paint cans and paraphernalia that litters the floor. Most days I walk around with at least one of four colors of paint splotched on me somewhere...my house and I are both wrecks.

It is helpful that India started back to preschool on Thursday so I have a little more time to take care of some of this stuff. She marched into school with only one small wobble of her chin and had a marvelous day.When we picked her up she was full of tales from her day and gave Kate a HUGE hug, telling her "I missed my Katie all day!". For her part, Kate repeated "I miss Heenya soooooo much" about every 20 minutes throughout the day.

After school we celebrated with some of India's friends by having a "backwards" dinner (dessert first). Bet you can guess how much chicken India and Kate ate after their chocolate sundaes! Things got a little rowdy in Stella's after dinner; we tipped the poor waitress well and will just cross our fingers that we will be allowed back.

Let it rain, let it pour,

Let it rain a whole lot more,

'Cause I got them deep river blues.

Let the rain drive right on,

Let the waves sweep along,

'Cause I got them deep river blues.

--Doc Watson (orig. Delmore Brothers)

Ernesto was full of surprises Friday as it slammed the Eastern Shore with havoc-wreaking wind and rainfall. We were pummeled with gusts that reportedly reached a top speed of 73mph, and unconfirmed rainfall totals waver between 8 and 10 inches. The Turmanators were caught completely off-guard (odd, since Tracy is head of the Eastern Shore Disaster Planning Coalition, but you know what they say about the cobbler's children having no shoes). Normally I have potable water, non-potable water, food plans, ice, etcetera, but NOT THIS TIME.

The short people and I went about our business Friday until the power went out at 1:30pm. It was a rough afternoon, filled with play-doh, crayons, emergency stashes of toys and anything else I could think of that didn't involve going outside or needing to see each other all that well...it was dark! The real trouble began when I walked into the laundry room and stepped into a puddle; water was dripping through the ceiling air vent. I frantically checked the house and found 5 leaks, 2 of which were hitting my great-grandmother's studio grand piano! Some of the leaks were coming through the clapboard siding because the rain was horizontal in the wind.

I scrambled around for 45 minutes throwing tarps, towels and buckets on everything while simultaneously refereeing the short people and preventing the entire kitchen from being coated in a film of play-doh. By 4:00 the driveway contained a pool, some major tree limbs were down, sheets of shingles were blowing around the yard and Tracy had made it safely home after backtracking twice to avoid flooded roads and downed trees. By 6:00 the wind and rain finally subsided and we went outside to survey the damage...not too bad.

Several hours later when it became necessary to flush a toilet we discovered that our decrepit claw-footed tub had not held one drop of the water I had filled it with hours before! No spare water...'til Tracy filled a 5 gallon bucket from some of the ponds outside. We ate dinner, listened to music on the radio and tucked the girls into bed (EARLY, I might add) via old fashioned hurricane lamplight.

Yesterday left the house at 7am and spent the entire day across the Bay in Virginia Beach, arriving home at 5:30 just as the power and our phones were turning back on. Heaven! Thank you, Delmarva Power and Verizon. Thank you, modern civilization.

We seem to be mostly unscathed, minus some roofing and leaking issues. You can bet that I'll be stocked to the gills for the next little thunderstorm!

Still having photography+computer issues...I'll go back and add some later.

You are what you eat?

The other day Kate ate bird poop. Not once, but twice. Yep! India runs frantically to me, out of breath, exclaiming "Mommy, Katie ate some bird poop! [disbelieving expression] I am serious!"! Kate looks on, sour-guilty. We had a big talk about how disgusting that was, yet she turns around and DOES IT AGAIN the next day! It was the purple stuff; must have looked good to her, I don't know. Anyway....

Yesterday the girls had to stand on tiptoe in a doctor's office to see a woman talking to them. Both rested their lips on the rim of her counter. The woman and I explained with gusto to India and Kate about all the germs on the counter and I (ever out for the laugh) felt compelled to share with this woman that Kate puts everything in her mouth, including the infamous bird poop. Katie, my little fury, clenches her fists and yells at the top of her lungs "I DON' EAT BIRD POOP ANY MO!!!!!!!!!!"

Not to be outdone in the humor department, India announces to Tracy this morning "Daddy, your hair is almost off. It's nekkid, too." Poor Tracy, with the ebb tide of male hair, has just gotten an extra short haircut.

Having a little problem getting the camera and the computer to share...hopefully can come back and add some photos soon.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY CLARE!

My sister taught me everything I really need to know, and she was only in sixth grade at the time. ~Linda Sunshine

P.S.- Check out my groovy coat and rust-colored cords. Aahh, I miss the 70's.

Delicious autumn! My very soul is wedded to it, and if I were a bird I would fly about the earth seeking the successive autumns. ~George Eliot

A hint of autumn is in the air on the Eastern Shore. Nothing I could put my finger on, maybe a drop in the humidity, but the air is different. Bluer skies, cooler mornings, and the running of the woolly caterpillars. My second-favorite season...my favorite being autumn's sister-twin, spring. This transitional season is too, too brief and the Turmanators are soaking in every bit of outdoors time we can.

Friday I took the girls to Assateague Beach, which is off Chincoteague Island and about 40 minutes away. Not my first choice of beaches here, but some friends chose to go and invited us along. Assateague is on the seaside and is considerably rougher than the bayside, so I haven't been up there since I was pregnant with India. The girls didn't do much swimming because the waves were just too gnarly for the short people, but they had a great time playing with friends, digging holes and chasing seagulls.

The first photo is of Tom's Cove, a great little cove for canoeing and kayaking, as you can see, or for crabbing and bird watching. You might even see the occasional Chincoteague pony if it is low tide. To the right (out of range of the picture) is the famous Assateague lighthouse. BC (Before Kids) we did a lot of kayaking up here.

The seagulls on Assateague are evil, nasty vultures in disguise. The instant they spy folk eating they spread the word and, suddenly you are surrounded by every beach pigeon on the Delmarva Peninsula. The kids took to throwing sand balls at them after they took a cracker right out of Henry's hand. Yuck! This brazen behavior is shaped by obnoxious tourists to Chincoteague who love to feed them and go home to leave the rest of us to live with the insufferable birds. Poor Ellie was dive-bombed here like Tippi Hedren in "The Birds". One can only imagine the bird-poop; I won't go into details here.

Friday night we held a camping dress rehearsal. We chose a wonderful locale as near as possible to the relative safety of beds, nightlights, and familiar surroundings...the backyard. Luckily we have a big one with no visible neighbors. My girls (whose first words were both "side" for "outside" LOVED it. Loved it, that is, until 10pm when these 8pm bedtimers still weren't able to sleep and requested that we take them back into their home for the remainder of the night. Too bad, Tracy and I had a great view of the stars and were lucky enough to witness a couple of shooting ones. The fire kept the mosquitos from carrying us away but I will say we're all covered in Benadryl creme this morning. Oh, well. We'll try again next year. "Til then, maybe we'll just stick with making s'mores.

Honest...this was the fortune inside a cookie shared by India and Kate. How cool! And, at least for the moment, they seem to be living it. India helps Kate take off her shoes and helps me tuck her in for naps with sweet kisses and hugs. Sometimes they hold hands. Kate refuses to say India's name any other way than "Hinya" even though she knows how...it's her way of being affectionate. That's not to say that they don't whallop the crap out of each other for major infractions like one touching each other's My Little Pony, putting their feet on each other or refusing to play "picnic" with the other. Who could blame them; hell, doesn't that make you mad, too?


I've been tagged and I know all my friends are sick of me forwarding these things to them, so I won't. I'm just posting my answers here and anyone who wants to can play along.

FOUR JOBS I WISH I HAD THE ABILITY TO DO:
1. physician
2. artist
3. singer
4. FBI profiler or forensic psychiatrist

FOUR NAMES I WISH I HAD OTHER THAN MY OWN:
1. Was almost named India...that would have been nice
2. Jaqueline
3.
4. Couldn't think of any more. Both are family names; Jaqueline was my grandmother's name.

FOUR OF MY FAVORITE ACTORS/ACRESSES:
1. Kevin Spacey
2. Meryl Streep
3. Robin Williams
4. Ed Norton

FOUR SONGS I COULD LISTEN TO OVER AND OVER
(this changes often...I get bored musically)
1. RESPECT by Aretha
2. the whole first side of the"It's a Beautiful Day" album by It's a Beautiful Day
3. Bittersweet Symphony by The Verve
4. Round and Round by Neil Young

FOUR TV SHOWS I LOVE TO WATCH
1. The Daily Show
2. CSI (the original)
3. the Food Network
4.

FOUR PLACES I WOULD LIKE TO GO ON VACATION
1. Galapagos Islands on an ecotour
2. Belize
3. Italy
4. Spain

FOUR FAVORITE CUISINES
1. Italian
2. Japanese/Chinese
3. Mexican/Spanish
4. learning to like Indian

FOUR PLACES I WISH I WERE RIGHT NOW
1. having a massage
2. any of the above-listed vacation spots
3. on the beach by myself reading a book
4. San Diego with Tracy

Who ever thought a little girl like you could destroy my beautiful wickedness?

--The Wicked Witch of the West

Ever wonder what made this chick so mean...and green? The tell all "biography" of the Wicked Witch of the West, entitled Wicked: The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West by Gregory Maguire is filling me in. I'm not quite halfway through the book, and I am enchanted (pun intended). Thus far I have learned the history of the early years of Elphaba (WWotW) her sister Nessarose (WWotE and the one who is crushed by Dorothy's house), and the good witch Glinda as they grow up during a time of political unrest in Oz. I am getting the feeling that the witches are not as evil as they were potrayed in the original; they become involved with resisting grassroots and political movements to eliminate a perceived lower class; these movements are tied to the ruler's religious and enviromental beliefs (any of this sounding familiar?). I wonder about the social and political symbolism...it is reminescent of similar themes in Alice in Wonderland. Who'd have thought that the Wicked Witches were really social justice pioneers in disguise? Anyone else out there read this book? I'd love to chat about it.

Now onto my little witches. Ever so slowly it becomes real to me that there are no more babies in the house...and if I should forget Kate reminds me by yelling "TATE NOT A BABY!!!!!!!!"

I feel a tinge of wistfulness about this every so often, but mostly I am thrilled. We are slowly but surely removing the babyproofing paraphernalia, Kate is well on her way to potty training, and last night we converted Kate's crib to a toddler bed and moved her into India's room. She is so proud of herself, affirming "I do it myself" when it's time to get out of bed. They are thrilled to share a room and Tracy is on his way upstairs right now to tell them to stop talking and GO TO SLEEP.

We are glad to have our guest room back (as will be many of you) but it a little sad saying goodbye to the nursery that we decorated with such care and anticipation when I was pregnant with India. Down went the baby quilt wall hanging, the changing table, and the memo board filled with baby hospital bracelets and other mementos. And it was a little strange last night to walk past that room with it's door open wide...no need to avoid the creaking board outside the room anymore. Anyone want to visit? We have extra room!

Myrtle Beach Days...We'll Have Some Fun in the Waves....
-- the Fantastic ShakersBoth Short and Tall Turmans had a great week in Myrtle Beach. Mind you, it took some getting used to. Tracy and I are humbugs when it comes to traffic and crowds; we like our vacations filled with solitude and quiet and Myrtle Beach is not exactly the embodiment of either. But our girls love all the flash and sparkle and how do you say no to those two faces?

Our little "baysiders" also had some adjusting to do; they are used to the warm, rocking waters of the Chesapeake and were initially frightened by the cooler, frothy, and sometimes intimidating crashing waves of South Carolina. It didn't help that there was a full moon and the tide was at it's highest of the summer. But as you can see from the above photo India, at least, adjusted well to a real surf.
We spent most of our time divided between the beach and the pool but did venture out to some tourist destinations. Tracy's parents took the girls to a "Build a Bear" workshop, which was surely a highlight of their trip. The girls continue to sleep with their new lovies, Twinkles and Cookie, and were thrilled to help create a new friend. They truly enjoyed the entire Broadway at the Beach scene, complete with a dragon, volcano, ducks, fish, and a tequila-spouting hurricane at the Margaritaville restaurant.

Yes, we ate lunch at Margaritaville. I truly loathe Jimmy Buffet (no hate mail, please) and there is a whole group of women who still curse me for making them leave a Jimmy Buffett fraternity party freshman year (I told them I would go, but that if "Cheeseburger in Paradise " was playing we would all have to leave immediately, and what song began the minute we walked in the door...but a deal is a deal). Not my idea of good music but the scene was festive and the "hurricane" that showered tequila was very cool.

The girls also enjoyed putting on a show at the pier bar. It was too early for the band, but the Turman girls took over the stage as Kiss' "I Wanna Rock 'N Roll" played on the stereo. I'm not sure how Dex and Judy felt, but Tracy and I were mighty proud. Next year we're getting them tattoos and a cropped, airbrushed tee-shirt. Look out, Myrtle Beach 2007!

TURMAN’S LAW (tur’menz lo): N. The rule or principle by which one or more members of the Turman family become ill during or just prior to an important or exciting event.

Yes, there is illness in the Turman house. Yes, we are leaving tomorrow for Myrtle Beach. Turman's Law is in effect.

Kate and I have colds. India has a cold and an ear infection. India is 4 years old and has NEVER had an ear infection...until now. Why, oh why does this always happen to us? Thank goodness for antibiotics and let's just keep our fingers crossed that Kate and I don't develop the same problem while 2 states away from our doctors.

Today's photos are from a healthier time last week when we were playing with our brand new bubble machine, bought on major sale at CVS. Best 5 bucks I've spent in quite some time; everyone loves the thing except the cat, as you can see.

I'm throwing things in bags left and right and looking forward to a week of rest, relaxation, and two doting grandparents who love the short people. Everyone, please send healthy vibes our way, and I'll see you in a week!